Your partner would rather check their Facebook status than look at your face
Sure, animal videos and banal updates on the lives of people you haven’t talked to since freshman year of college are interesting, but when your partner—or you— start scrolling though endless pages of internet happenings, that’s not doing your relationship any favors. “We truly have become a mobile world,” Dr. Breur says. “And with all the information and social media available 24/7, we have become a society that does not make communicating face to face a priority.” Her recommendation is to discuss this with your partner and come up with a tech-free solution you both agree on. One example might include not using the phone in the bedroom or while eating meals. Enjoying more personal interaction in a phone or computer-free environment will likely bring you closer.
You’re easily bothered by their voice pattern, cough, or sneeze
Feel like you’d rather drag your nails on a chalkboard than hear your partner sneeze? If the sound of common habits, like a cough or sniffle start to irk you like no tomorrow, stress could be the culprit. Breur says that this is likely the stress you put on yourself manifesting in such a way that you become agitated with every little thing. She says to “be real about yourself” by assessing everything from whether you’re burning the candle at both ends at work to possible feelings that no one acknowledges your efforts. Next, ask your partner for help. After all, Breur explains, “Your partner is not a mind reader and needs to know your needs and even your life dreams.”
You or your partner are drinking too much alcohol
A couple of glasses of wine on occasion is one thing, but if you’ve started having that same amount of wine or hard alcohol on a daily basis, it could be indicative of an unhealthy stress management behavior. “Many couples excuse these behaviors when they are dating and then act surprised that the behavior continues into cohabitation or marriage,” Dr. Breur says. Alcohol abuse is mentally and physically destructive to the relationship, not to mention the person doing the drinking. Breur advises you to cut back on drinking or, if necessary, considering seeking out a support group or talking to your doctor.